"You're Too Skinny and Pale"

I'm sharing these experiences for anyone who has struggled with low self-esteem and body image issues.  I've dealt with both my whole life.  I knew I was different from a very young age.  I remember hearing my pediatrician tell my Mom I was in the 5th percentile for weight.  I've been underweight my entire life and people seem to think that gives them the right to judge me.  

Being skinny comes with many different pros and cons than someone who is overweight.  But in my experience, comments from people about my body can hurt just as much as things said to someone who struggles with weighing too much.  It all boils down to someone saying you don’t fit their idea of what a body should look like and you should do something to change yourself into the world’s view of what is attractive.
  
I will never forget sitting on the bus in 9th grade and a boy I thought was my friend sat next to me and asked “Are you anorexic?”.  I hid my shock and assured him I wasn’t, but it still hurt.  As if being too thin wasn’t enough, I’m also very pale and have red hair.  Once again, this contributed to my not fitting the ideal image of a beautiful woman, so I was asked by numerous family members and family friends “Why are you so pale?”. Or they would make comments like “You should go to the beach and get a tan.”
   
A few years ago I started hearing about something called a thigh gap.  I didn’t even know what this was until someone told me I had one.  It’s the space between your thighs when you put your knees together and some girls have it if they have thin legs like me.  Shortly after hearing about this, I saw several posts on social media talking about how some women were glad they didn’t have a thigh gap because it’s unattractive.

What all of these people didn’t realize is this is how God made me.  It took many years for me to accept this, and even embrace it.  I know I’m healthy.  I eat plenty so it’s not like I’m purposely trying to stay super thin.  I hate going to the beach because after 15 minutes I feel like I’m burning to death.  I don’t want a fake tan.  It would look ridiculous with my hair color.  I even tried dying my hair brown at one point because I was sick of being different.  But God made me a skinny, pale, red head, and that’s how I plan to stay.
  
I used to think I would never find a husband because I didn't look like the "ideal woman".  In 2011 I met a guy who prayed for a pale red headed wife.  We’ve been married for almost four years now and he has helped me see my beauty through God’s eyes.  Sometimes, I still struggle with feeling different.  But the older I get, the more I realize, tan or pale, thigh gap or no thigh gap, we are all beautiful in our own ways.  I hope more people realize this and stop judging others.

I believe no one should have anything negative to say about another person's body as long as they're healthy.  I'd like to see everyone building each other up with compliments rather than spewing the negative and hurtful things I've heard all my life.  If you've ever been judged in this way, I want you to know you are beautiful.  God made you just the way you are.  Do not let other people, who are probably insecure in their own skin, tear you down.  Let's come together and celebrate how unique God has made each and every one of us.